The Jiko Part

Last week I attended a jiko party. Though the invitation said "part" so I thought I'd spell it that way in the title.  "Jiko" is the Swahili word for kitchen.  There are two types of jiko parties here in Tanzania.  One is for a teenage girl who is entering the phase of her life where she is training to be a wife, mother, and general household manager (this is a several year long process).  The other type, which I attended, is for a young woman about to be married.  Essentially, a bridal shower.  Not knowing what type of gift was really appropriate, as I shopped I found myself wishing they had gift registries here. I finally settled on a pitcher and matching glasses set.  

My invitation to the part said it would begin at 2:00 in the afternoon.  Knowing that would never happen, I showed up at 3:00.  However, when there were no decorations and the hostess was wearing an oversized t-shirt, I realized this thing wasn't going to start for a very long time.  They welcomed me and sat me down in a chair and we chatted for 15 minutes or so until someone said, "You know, the party isn't going to start until 5:00."  

I said, "But my invitation said 2:00."  

"What? You got the wrong invitation."

Apparently I had been given the invitation for those who were helping to prepare for the event.  The hostess said, "But if you were Tanzanian, you probably wouldn't have shown up until 5:00 anyway.  You westerners always show up right on time."

I pointed out that I had, in fact, shown up an hour late, and she said, "Well, maybe you're becoming Tanzanian a little bit." It only took about 4 years. She said she would send someone to get me when they actually got things started.  So I went home and around 6:00 a girl came for me.  

A jiko party in Tanzania is similar to a bridal shower in the states as far as gift giving goes, though I think the gifts here are on the whole a bit more practical (even cleaning supplies are given). But it wasn't entirely the same.  First, only married women can come.  This is because much advice is given to the bride-to-be about marriage, etc.  In fact, they have kind of an MC who goes through all the different categories of advice, such as communication, cleaning, attitude, etc.  This MC just calls on random people and makes them get up and give advice about a particular topic (Many of those present were extremely reluctant advisors.  It was pretty funny.).  And yes, I was called on.  I went up to the front where the bride and maid of honor were sitting, and had to give advice about how to keep your body clean.  "Umm...use soap?"  Seriously?  What was I supposed to say?  Part of me was glad I didn't get asked about one of the more culture-related categories because I'm sure my advice would not have been useful here.  But part of me was just as exasperated to get this topic because this girl knows how to keep herself clean.  She takes showers, brushes her teeth, wears nice clothes.  I managed to talk for a couple of minutes and hopefully I didn't sound too much like I was talking to a 3 year old.  The person after me got how to keep the spirit clean.  Come on, I'm a missionary, I totally should have been given that one.  

This is someone giving advice about communication with your husband

After the very long, but interesting and sometimes quite entertaining advice giving part was over, we all got in a line and danced our gifts up to the front to give them to her.  I'm actually not sure what happened after that because I went home.  It was after dark and I needed to get home to a hungry Harper.  I'm pretty sure food was involved. I really enjoyed this experience.  I think no matter how long I live here, I'm going to be experiencing and learning new things.